Stop Comparing Where You're At

Stop comparing where you’re at with where everyone else is. It doesn’t move you farther ahead, improve your situation, or help you find peace. It just feeds your shame, fuels your feelings of inadequacy, and ultimately, it keeps you stuck. The reality is that there is no one correct path in life. Everyone has their own unique journey. A path that’s right for someone else won’t necessarily be a path that’s right for you. And that’s okay. Your journey isn’t right or wrong, or good or bad. It’s just different. Your life isn’t meant to look like anyone else’s because you aren’t like anyone else. You’re a person all your own with a unique set of goals, obstacles, dreams, and needs. So stop comparing, and start living. You may not have ended up where you intended to go. But trust, for once, that you have ended up where you needed to be. Trust that you are in the right place at the right time. Trust that your life is enough. Trust that you are enough. -Daniell Koepke

One Decade

It has been 10 years since I had started out working in Singapore. Back then in Ipoh, I worked for my dad and I had some odd part time jobs during school holiday. After graduated from secondary school, my choices are limited. I wasn't allowed to leave the town to further my studies. I'm also left with the choice of working in no other countries except Singapore. 

I remembered when I first decided went to Singapore to start on my career, it was a brave move. I have no goals in life and I do not have any future planning. I was't too sure where should I live, what job I should be looking for and I was kinda lost. 

I did some good scores in my SPM (O' Level). I refused to go the traditional way of spending 2 years in Form 6 (A' Level) and to carry on another 4 years in the local university which makes up the total of 6 years to complete a Degree. Having thought that could take me forever to obtain a degree, I've chosen the express way. I convinced my parents that I could complete much faster if I enroll into the private college. Without much thought, I hastily chosen the type of course which I'm not really keen of - Computer Studies. I couldn't care much because all I want was to complete my studies fast enough so I could start earning on my own. I've completed my Diploma in less than a year and I further myself to the Advanced. 

In just 2 1/2 years time, I'm left with only one module to complete my Advanced Diploma. I'm pretty sure that I made the right choice because I am still beyond my friends but I was wrong. I failed my final module (Java Programming). Not just once but I failed for thrice. I found myself struggling. 

At the same time, I couldn't deal with my dramatic relationship which had lead to my dramatic family issues. I had lost my focus and patience to carry on with my final module. I refused to face and overcome the mess that I've created. I am determined to leave Ipoh. I danced in joy when my best buddy Sabrina, asked me to join her trip to Singapore for job hunting. My chance is here. I wanted to leave. I dropped out of my college immediately without hesitation and left for Singapore. 

Although, I did not complete my Advanced Diploma, but I'm still awarded with a Diploma certificate. With my somewhat Diploma cert, I wasn't even too sure if I could even make use of it because I have zero intention to go into the IT industry. I've created a mindset that I could earn my first pile of gold in Singapore. I am more than ready to work my ass off. 

So I travelled to Singapore with SGD200 cash and a handheld travel bag. I put up in Sabrina's sister's place. I applied blindly for the jobs which was advertised on the papers and the web. I needed to secure a job quick enough because it's nearly impossible to survive on the cash that I have. I would take on any decent job even if it would mean being as a waitress. A week later, I found a job but it only lasted for 3 days because I don't quite like the idea of going door-to-door selling the company products. 

It took me not too long to secure another job in administrative. I moved out to share a room with my cousin sister and her boyfriend. Obviously this was ridiculously awkward. I couldn't afford renting a room on my own during that period so I have to be extra thick-skinned for that 3 months. Later on, I  moved to shared another room with some friends which became even more complicated and I got my cash stolen by my roommate. I started to live on my own thereafter.

I survived my first few months on bread loafs and canned food. I kept convincing myself that life wasn't that difficult because I didn't starved. There was a time where I attempted 4 century eggs at once because it was so dirt cheap and it cost me only a dollar plus for a meal. I suffered from food poisoning afterwards. I rejected century eggs intake forever since then. I learnt that living with parents it's the best choice because you will always be taken care of. I miss that each time when I fell sick. 

I earned less than a thousand dollar in my first job and I survived. I never like to stay constant in my job. I want to know how far I could go so I had career switch and I was given opportunity to take on something new. I'm now dealing with figures everyday. I'm still keeping up with my part time studies and in another few more years I'm sure I'll be able to provide much better for myself. I learnt that if I made more wiser choice 10 years ago, I would have ended up much higher in the corporate ladder but I never regretted the choice that I made because I realized it's never to late to make a change. 

In relationship wise, all I could say is my heart has been fooled before. I don't really care what would have been. Forgive and forget. I'm loving my single-hood and I'm having so much fun of it.

I'm living my life in moderation and keep trying to achieve my targets to realize my to-do lists. I've learnt that being rich in cash is nothing but being rich in the heart gives you everything. Life is that simple.

I now able to realize my dream to go on traveling with my friends and family. I've already been to 2 different countries in these 4 months! I hope to travel to each of the countries around the world in each year.

Ten years on, to stay or to leave Singapore? The hardest choice to make. This place leaves me with bittersweet memories.